Criticism. Essay. Fiction. Science. Weather.
week:
1As the maps to our official past, monuments and memorials literally set our history in stone. 2Civil War Re-enactments and the Bradley Fighting Vehicles that Love Them. 3One whatever's perspective on
American/Iranian relations 4Tin soldiers and Nixon's coming - Or -
Delaware is the geographical center of Ohio 5This is not about Terri Schiavo.
We promise. 6Stick it to the Gideons. 7California increases its prison population six-fold and strikes a blow for the union man. 8It's not you; it's me... 9What's the Christian Coalition going to do with this one? 10Corporate nonprofit? Isn't that an oxymoron? Jed Emerson doesn't think so. And neither should you. 11You heard it here first:
Michael Jackson, not guilty! 12What's good for GM is good for GM. 13The Quaterly Review continues...
...with 2 Essays from the archives. 14What's that smell?
Saying no to the post-expiration date Nation-State. 15An antidote to the All-Star Break: Life before
the homerun call was on steroids. 16An antidote to the All Star Break: Life before
the homerun call was on steroids (cont.). 17Riding the city at night with a radio. 18Why shampoo really is the key to global economic development. 19Goat meat and digital watches: how to lay down the law without writing down the rules 20The control button is right down there. Next to the Z button. 21Clear Channels and
Herfindahl-Hirschman Indices 22Le Corbusier, meet Dr. Livingstone: using blank spots on the map to plan urban development. 23Sunk before it started raining: how the Army Corps of Engineers dammed Louisiana. 24The Carceral Continuum: I got my diploma from a school called Rikers, knowhatimsayin? 25Hey Betty and Veronica, let's find out
who wrote the Book of Love. 26The quarterly reviews go marching two by two, hurrah! hurrah! 27It's a mosque; it's a church; it's ... a museum! 28We're back for seconds, and it's not even Thanksgiving yet. 29The only thing standing between you and free Internet is the Titanic. 30Capitalism: the worst economic system,
except all the others. 31All the cool kids are doing it... 32In America you get food to eat; won't have to run through the jungle and scuff up your feet. 33Q-Tip never wanted Tommy Hilfiger
to be his friend. 34I am what I am not, even if it's only because
that's what people think I am. 35From Good ... to Great! 36Daylight makes these cities shrink. 37¡AGUANTALA! 38A chicken in every pot and
a deed to every garage. 39Celebrate the seasons with the Quarterly Review! 40The jig is up, Mr. Nobel. 41Will the circle be unbroken?
By and by, Lord, by and by. 42There's nothing to figure out, General Turgidson. This man is obviously a psychotic. 43It's the Buddhists and the Communists
in a fight to the death. 44Yes, this Essay is about
Punky Brewster. 45This article isn't just about being a bad friend. 46Something has gone wrong with the bathmat. 47It's more of a suspended state of poverty. 48Politics has always been complicated, I guess. 49The Cuyahoga Daily Mirror, this ain't. 50If Air America couldn't do it
maybe Al Jazeera can. 51Bzz, Bzz. Who's there? A culture of transparency. 52RVs (but no propane) in the R.V. 53Adding ads ad nauseum. 54Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, sometimes it rains: Peru's election goes to a runoff. 55The first kind is unpleasant and ill paid;
the second is pleasant and highly paid. 56Prison continues, on those who are entrusted to it, a work begun elsewhere... 57If versimilitude can be lost, then it must exist. But how can it exist in a world of irreconcilable inconsistencies? 58Certain young, beautiful, economically powerful women please take note. 59Bugs. On drugs. 60Progress. Genuine progress. 61Electricity and music. 62Garcia in; Chavez out. 63I thought globalization was
something we did to them. 64Twenty-three days, 189 bicyles.
Could there be anything better? 65The First Quarterly Review:
Taste it again for the first time. 66An undersized, ill-dribbling twenty-something
feeling jealous. 67Wal*Mart goes organic. Right. 68Stop us before we pollute again. 69Yes, they actually measure that. 70Even the Amish guys are cheating?
Not so fast... 71What Jeffrey Sachs would proclaim if he spent all day sitting on his tuchus. 72Blueberry or coconut infusion? That'll be extra. 73Point being: ride your bike. 74If it's still broke, don't fix it. 75If Judd and Sam can do it,
so can I. 76Grandma Kenya's new cell phone
package totally rules! 77Two bracelets and two necklaces?
That'll be $20 and your manhood. 78What Jeffrey Sachs would proclaim if he spent all day sitting on his tuchus. 79The elusive fall season... 80Kenneth Pollack gets no respect. 81900 is the new 300. 82That's affirmative. Or, at least, it ought to be. 83Where's the outrage? 84Saddam Husseing - not a good person. 85Headaches call for leeches on the temples. 86Less than nine months behind schedule
and OK by me. 87We may not know all the words,
but we know when it's done wrong. 88Nephrons. And Frank Ghery.
You make the call. 89All these activist legislatures are enough to make you miss Samuel Alito. 90See it again, for the 90th time. 91A Seventh Quarter Two-fer. 92The man they called Body Love. 93Five years old is far too old for a federal law. 94Being Very Professional 95Not a single loaf has left the building
for over a decade. 96An Absentee article. 97You're less than nothing.
You're dirt. 98Get down to the basics.
The basic basics. 99You can almost understand
why Britney shaved her head. 100April's coming.
Here's what's in store. 101The coolest thing ever. I think. 102Not only are we going to grow mangoes, but we'll sell them, too. 103Famous for being famous. Just like Paris Hilton, but less trashy. 104Fourth Quarterly Reviews bring spring
showers and 90ways anniversaries. 105There's a new bunny in town. Just in time for Easter.
106Dream small. 107If Hillside won, then I was Truckzilla. 108Disco boys on bicycles.
Dispatch from Kenya
Carter Romansky
This check-in from Kenya begins with a story from America. It's about a woman named Grandma, and, depending on where you are coming from, it may or may not have a moral. The story takes place in two acts, each one contrasted against the other.
Act I: Grandma is a pillar of the community. For the last 30 years she's run the general store on the corner, and she has always treated her customers with respect and fairness. Grandma is cute, frail, kind-hearted, and defenseless. She gives kids free lollipops when their parents aren't looking, and she knows every customer by name.
One day, a new customer comes into the store. He wears a designer suit and crocodile shoes. His broad-collared shirt is open wide to reveal a hairy chest and several gold chains. He wears dark sunglasses, and his hair is slicked straight back. Because he is new in town, the stranger decides to introduce himself and his two very large friends to Grandma.
"Hi, Grandma," he says. "My name is Jimmy Mafucci. These two men are my colleagues, Bone Crusher and Dog Meat. We are seeking donations for our charitable organization. Since you are such an upstanding citizen, we thought you might find it in your heart to donate $100 to our cause."
"Oh, I don't know," said Grandma. "I'm just a simple shopkeeper, and $100 is a lot of money for me.
"Well, that's too bad, Grandma," said Mr. Mafucci.
"Yeah, too bad," said his colleagues.
"We had really hoped you could help us out," said Mr. Mafucci as he and his colleagues headed for the door.
The next day Grandma arrived early to open her shop (as she always did) and to her dismay found that a large projectile had made its way through her front window. Who would do such a thing to a beloved community member like Grandma?
A couple of days later, as Grandma sat behind the counter of her shop with a beautiful new window in place, Mr. Mafucci and his colleagues stopped in for a visit.
"Gee, Grandma, that's a beautiful new window you have," said Mr. Mafucci.
"Yes, a beautiful new window," said his colleagues.
"We thought you might reconsider a gift to our charitable organization," said Mr. Mafucci.
"Oh, well," said Grandma, "I think I could spare some money for a donation."
"You are a very kind and generous individual," said Mr. Mafucci.
"A very kind and generous individual," said his colleagues.
Over the next year, Mr. Mafucci and his colleagues made sure to visit Grandma every week, and they were never disappointed by her generosity. But one day, they arrived at Grandma's shop to find a "Closed" sign on the door. Unfortunately, Grandma had been too generous and could no longer afford to pay the rent for her shop.
"Now, that's too bad," said Mr. Mafucci.
"Yeah, too bad," said his colleagues.
*
Act II: Same shop, same Grandma. Only this time instead of Mr. Mafucci and his colleagues walking into Grandma's shop, a man named Sam Walton walks in.
"Hi, Grandma," said Mr. Walton. "I thought I'd stop in and introduce myself, seeing as how I'm going to be your new neighbor and all."
"Well, welcome to town, Mr. Walton," said Grandma, always the neighborly sort. "We're mighty glad to have you."
One day, after closing up her shop, Grandma decided to say hi to Mr. Walton in his shop. As she strolled down the aisles looking for the counter where Mr. Walton sat, Grandma noticed that every item in Mr. Walton's store cost exactly $1 less than the same item cost in her store.
"Oh no," thought Grandma, "I better lower my prices or else all my customers will start shopping here at Mr. Walton's store." Over the next year, Grandma went to visit Mr. Walton in his store many times, and every time she did, she noticed that no matter how much she had reduced her prices, Mr. Walton always charged $1 less for every item.
One day Mr. Walton noticed that Grandma hadn't visited for a while, and so he decided that he would pay her a visit. When he got to Grandma's shop, he noticed a sign on the door: "Out of Business."
"Now that's too bad," said Mr. Walton. "Too bad."
*
In America we have rules that govern economic activity, that set the terms for exchange between two parties. Our rules say that what Mr. Mafucci and his colleagues did was wrong, but that what Mr. Walton did was okay. Using physical muscle to force someone out of business is not acceptable, while using economic muscle to do the same thing is. But to Grandma, does the mechanism really matter? Probably not.
Yet this is something that happens every day to Grandmas across the country. And intuitively it makes sense to us because that's just the way we do it. We have internalized the rules of the system.
When I got to Kenya, three different people tried to sell me a safari package before I had even left the airport. Each one of them told me that he had a "friend" who would get me a great deal and show me lots of lions and giraffes and zebras. My guide books told me that each one of the had a friend who would probably walk off with my money.
Obviously, I didn't take anyone up on any of these offers. I needed to survey my options first. Shop around a bit. But everywhere I went - and everything I've tried to buy - was a matter of talking to some guy who had a friend who would get me a great deal. Were they telling me the truth? Or were they trying to fleece me? I don't know. And I don't know how anyone would know. It seems like every transaction in this corrupt and lawless country was just a black market, smoke and mirrors game of three card monty (to mix several metaphors). It's enough to make a guy long for good old institutionalized, Uncle Sam-style capitalism. At least that's an actual system, where each party knows what he's getting into with every transaction.
But let's think for a minute about Grandma's Kenyan counterpart. And let's pretend for a minute that she's buying a safari.You can bet that she'd know exactly how to find the friend you could trust. Why? Because she knows the rules; she sees the system.
To me, the three men who approached me in the airport were intrusive, pushy, and untrustworthy. To Grandma Kenya, they were just -- advertising. And when you think about it, those guys are no more intrusive, pushy, or untrustworthy than the ads that enter our homes through TV and magazines on a daily basis. We're just more accustomed to the ads than to the men at the airport. What's more is that each one of their safari-leading friends are just doing their respective bests to make a buck. And of course they're going to fleece me. They're going to charge me as much as they possibly can without losing my business to someone else. Is that any different from what Verizon is trying to do to me every time I sign up for a new cell phone contract? Not really. The only reason they don't take me for more is that they know I'm going to stop by the Cingular store down the street and compare prices. And they know that if they quote me too high a price, the guy at the Cingular store will find a friend who can get me a better deal. The only difference between me and Grandma Kenya is that when it comes to shopping for a safari, she knows where the Cingular store is and I don't. But when it comes to buying a cellphone plan in Boston, Grandma Kenya is going to feel every bit as fleeced as I do over here.
*
Now, on some level, this is all a little bit too radical for me. There is a voice that keeps telling me that the things happening between me and Verizon are fundamentally different - and better - from the things happening between Grandma Kenya and the unnamed safari salesman. And it all centers around continuity. I know that if Verizon promises me one thing and I don't get it, I can walk right back to the store and demand a refund. Or at the very least, I can decide to never shop there again. The same thing doesn't apply here in Kenya. Certainly not for me, and maybe not for Grandma. But the question is would the rules I have in America be the same for Grandma Kenya if she were to come visit. I like to think that they would. Especially at large, permanent institutions. But it's not only important that the rules and norms of economic exchange are consistent, but also that they are obvious enough for anyone unfamiliar with them to figure out.
When you think about all this in the context of "economic development," it certainly makes you wonder about the right way to approach things. On the one end of the development spectrum is foreign direct investment, which involves the Verizons of the world setting up shop here in Kenya. At the other end are campaigns and strategies which focus purely on growing locally-based, domestic entrepreneurial ventures. The difficulty is that the foreign direct investment initiatives create systems where Grandma Kenya is essentially trying to navigate the Boston cell phone marketplace in her own back yard. Will she get the new economic rules and norms that her country is playing by now that Verizon has come to town, or will she constantly feel like she's getting fleeced? But at the same time, encouragement of local entrepreneurs results in growing a system that resembles the smoke and mirrors, friend of a friend game that I had to play while looking for a safari. Is that okay? Certainly it's not ideal for me, but I don't think it is for Grandma Kenya either. And that's because as the economic system grows, Grandma Kenya isn't necessarily gaining more economic power, which means that the safari dealers of the world have no reason to be transparent with her. The key is to make sure that Grandma Kenya gains access to clear, consistent information -- whatever system she is in. And, as with most things in the world, the best way to do that is through the ever-popular mixed approach: it's going to have to be a bit local and a bit global.