Criticism. Essay. Fiction. Science. Weather.
week:
1The disadvantages of having a hole in your
foot, a cat named Buckley, and falling in love. 2Come eat it.
Or don't. 3Wine, Shoulder, Bolt, Socket. 4Mothbombs 5On the road with your only soul. 6One woman's trash is another woman's treasure 7Aliens! Right here in America! 8It's not as crazy as it sounds
or, music is as music does 91) Sign.
2) Hope for the best. 10A friendship in a bottle. 11A five-year-old tries his hand at action adventure. 12Will the circle be unbroken. 1390ways' first Quaterly Review rages on:
2 samples of Fiction. 14Muscles and fat.
A thin layer of sweat. 15Fiction goes serial.
Part 1 has sex and drugs.
You know you want to stay tuned. 16Our fiction serial concludes to cure your
vertigo from last week's cliff-hanger. 17An iced-out 21-speed sensation: The Moves are
all up on your handlebars. 18We're all in this together.
Except those bastards in administration. 19Jilted, laughed at,
and in the air. 20Swirling and swirling... 21You can't make yourself like them, but you have to pretend because they are your family. 22How well do jewel cases retain odor?
About as well as you stink. 23It's black and white. It's old world.
It's photo time. 24Piggy calls, wanting to sell you insurance.
This is what's on the other end of the line. 25A long pause, then, 26Fiction's Second Qaurterly Review
can speak Italian. 27It's only bread, after all. 28It's job search time at 90ways. 29George W. Bush's resting heart rate and a bum in a green sweater. 30Antique weaponry and teenage angst.
Together at last. 31One-hundred-fifty-three syllables
of October fun. 32there is only
self 33She's cold to the touch.
Cold and pebbly. 34Gut-wrenching love.
And wallabies. 35Building a habit out of ivies and orange flowers. 36A 90ways exclusive sneak peak at the
new and groundbreaking Alphabet Book. 37Type it with one hand and
see what happens 38A face any susbsitence farmer could love. 39The Quarterly Review: read it again for the third time. 40For every task, someone is the best.
Sometimes that's impressive. 41I didn't get a computer;
I moved to Indiana. 42The deepest of mistreatments, in three. 4390ways has new concerns about identity theft. Lock up the children and your sense of self. 44time. eyes. deep sighs. 45I know there's a place 4690 stars are born. 47I had to ask. 48It's about sex.
But isn't that always the way with classical music? 49The epistolary form in the 21st century.
Complete with neuroses and unpunctuation. 50There is no end to the party. 51Rockin to the sweet sounds of prepared food. 52Of or pertaining to. 53Including spaces, this blurb is 90 characters. Ways, words, characters. It is a leitmotif. 54Minnesota. Miami. Poetry in 90ways' Fiction.
It's the best of all worlds. 55It lives and breathes and is hungry for carnival food. 56Manhandled, womanclutched, or otherwise attended. 57The curtain is being pulled back... 58Up in the Fiction house! It's a bird. It's a plane.
It's an illustralogue! 59The hat, in all honesty, is a private matter. 60Putting up with all the doth. 6190words strike terror into the hearts of the longwinded. 62Return of the illustralogue! 63Take one down, pass it around,
blow your nose. 64All any of us want is a little approval and some light stalking. 65The First Quarterly Review wants
you to meet its little friend. 66From our servers to your ear buds!
It's misguided enthusiasm, in podcast form! 67Questions for the man himself.
Plus, the podcast adventure continues. 68No one would ever use Starbucks
to define their identity. Right... 69Don't you remember the rose clipped under my windshield wiper like a butterfly under a pin? 70Oh, it's nothing.
Oh, it's life-threatening disease. 71It's not you. It's me.
And my Eurasian captors.
72Root, root, root for the brisk
sale of anything possible. 73Look within the very bowels of the soul.
Or at least your mother. 74We're not strangers any more. 75He knows of what he speaks. 76I find that often times I'm quite
mature enough to enjoy a few beverages. 77He is licking me.
I don't like it one bit. 78Our favorite stuff is coming 'round the mountain, again. 79A wooden-back brush and a homemade bowl of oatmeal. 80A man's home is his... 81Fack to the Buture. 82This dude pulled back on his nose
and mucus and unleashed a city. 83The polls are in. 93% of respondents do not approve of the monkeybone lodged in their lower lip 84Like a thirsty man in the desert 85Taxpayer dollars wasted on broken egg. News at eleven. 86She loves her red octopus.
She will chew it to death. 87Bubbling, gurgling, fighting a moment to stay afloat. 88Molting our pasts into the air... 89The Return of 90 Words 90It comes but once a... ever. 91Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's, the end of the Fiscal Quarter. 92The 540 word circle is now unbroken. 93An emptying out of the animus, perceived as tranquility
94All roads lead to South Dakota. Or at least the I-90 does, anyway. 95He laid down his whittling knife and he and his brother took up arms in rage. 96Drinking manhattans made with a good bourbon, and strong. 97Living white and pudgy, I never expected much for myself. Now, I could tell that was true. 98A few gestural lines towards the thought of death. 99Rest in peace.
I know I will. 100And then we played baseball and then we played army and then we were best friends. 101We torn holes in sheets and became ghosts for each other's pleasures. 102I looked at the pictures of you, twenty years old,
sometimes skinny and sometimes your face a soft moon.
103Fingers clutching little trinkets of the day... 104All roads lead to South Dakota. Or at least the I-90 does, anyway. 105Everywhere signs of an interstice arriving. 106What you see and what you believe are two different things. 107It was as if a million literary ghosts poured from its pages, moaning to be set free. 108So what if too many times we have been here, both
lost in our machinations...
Mattopia
Judson Merrill
Matt is sitting in his room. A knock. Matt answers the door. Jimmy stands in the hallway.
MATT: Hello, hello.
JIMMY: Greetings.
MATT: And how are you?
JIMMY: Capital. Thank you. And you?
MATT: Fine, fine... lovely weather, what?
JIMMY: Raining cats and dogs actually.
MATT: You coming from New England?
JIMMY: Yes.
MATT: Ha. You know what they say about the weather in New England.
JIMMY: You presumptuous bastard!
Jimmy storms off. Matt closes door and sits back down. A knock. Matt opens the door. Jimmy is back.
JIMMY: I -- I'm sorry we fought earlier.
MATT: I've already forgotten it.
JIMMY: It was a very confusing time for me. Things were said that I regret. Things just started coming out of my mouth all wrong. That bastard crack... that was wrong. What I meant to say was, can I come in?
MATT: I think you should tell me what it was you intended to say first.
JIMMY: That was it. Can I come in?
MATT: Ah. Well. That's actually a bit of a sticky wicket.
JIMMY: Oh.
MATT: Yes....
JIMMY: I can come in?
MATT: Oh. I hate when you do that.
JIMMY: What do I do that you hate?
MATT: You ask a question, I say no, you rearrange the words in your question and ask it again. And somehow it ends up sounding like I said yes the first time.
JIMMY: You hate what that I do?
MATT: You cannot come in. Even if I wanted to let you in, I could not.
JIMMY: And why might that be?
MATT: You don't have a visa.
JIMMY: Do you take cash?
MATT: No, man. An entry visa.
JIMMY: Oh. Take cash you do?
MATT: No. No. As a representative of the sovereign nation of Mattopia I cannot let you in unless I have previously issued you a visa. I also need to see a passport from your country of origin.
JIMMY: Mattopia?
MATT: Yes. Welcome. You've come to the right place.
JIMMY: And here I thought this house was just a part of Massachusetts.
MATT: Somebody hasn't been following the news.
JIMMY: I guess not.
MATT: We seceded from the Union on Tuesday.
JIMMY: Wow. Is that what those marines on your front lawn are about?
MATT: Quite. Border guards. The lawn itself is actually a demilitarized no-fly-zone right now, while we work out the details. I'm hoping to become a part of NATO soon and that should ease up a lot of the security you're seeing now.
JIMMY: Sure, sure.
MATT: The weather's always nice here.
JIMMY: What?
MATT: You were mentioning that back in Massachusetts it was raining.
JIMMY(pointing): Massachusetts... you mean over there?
MATT: To be sure. It hasn't rained once here in Mattopia.
JIMMY: Mattopia consisting of...
MATT: Well, our northern border is in the kitchen area and the country extends all the way down to the Rio Matto, formerly the southern gutter. East to west we stretch from this door to the back stoop.
JIMMY: Your house basically?
MATT: Yes.
JIMMY: I would imagine you see very little annual rainfall.
MATT: This is what I'm saying.
JIMMY: What with your entire country being indoors and all.
MATT: That is one of the advantages.
JIMMY: So. Is it hard for you to get into America or.... I was thinking we could go see a picture.
MATT: I don't really care for foreign films. And at least in these crucial first few months I'm trying to buy strictly Mattopian. Support the fledgling economy.
JIMMY: Right. Right.
MATT: Thanks for stopping by, though. I know it's awkward to talk over the border like this.
JIMMY: No problem. I hope to visit your country one day.
MATT: Well, I'll be pretty busy over the next few months. I have to adhere to a very strict training schedule for the Olympics.
JIMMY: You planning a celebration?
MATT: Of sorts. I'll be competing come February.
JIMMY: Wow. I didn't know that. In what event.
MATT: All of them.
JIMMY: Incredible.
MATT: We held tryouts for Team Mattopia last week and I was head and shoulders above all the competition. In every event. Really impressive.
JIMMY: The competition consisting of...
MATT: My mom and my cat. We thought about bringing them aboard the relay team but it's best just to go it on my own, I think.
JIMMY: Sure.
MATT: Anway, so I have to go practice the luge. And then the biatholon late today. Then figure skating tonight. That's where I think I'm really going to get some people excited.
JIMMY: Whoa. Look out Jesse Owens.
MATT: Well, I hope so.
JIMMY: You're obviously busy, I'll be on my way.
MATT: Thanks again for stopping by.
JIMMY: Farewell.
MATT: Salutations.
Just give me one thing I can play for.
Disco boys on bicycles.
So what if too many times we have been here, both
Poetic Retrospective
The Weather votes for Kelly Clarkson.